Can a Downbeat Artist Be an Upbeat Blogger?

'No one wants to read someone's moaning rant' read the thoughtful article about how to engage with your potential blog audience. Fair enough I suppose. I don't like the scary man in the coffee queue as much as the next man. You know the one I mean. The one swearing and talking to himself. I'd rather get my coffee with a fake smile, if necessary, and go.

This is all good and well. It's sound logic to apply the rules of the real world to writing for your blog. After all it is actual people who you hope will read it.

None of this is my problem. What happens however when an artist who deals in dark subject matter decides to express themselves online?

Should they fake being upbeat when they're really not all that keen on the world and its - sometimes - wicked ways? Or should they rant on anyway and risk losing their readership?

The solution may be based on the rules of attraction. Often darkness breeds a particular sense of humour so perhaps genuine comedy can reside alongside your familiar pathos and bile.

What's certain is that it can't all be just doom and gloom.

We need a few examples here of this hypothesis in effect. The ear slicing scene from Reservoir Dogs is both horrific and, dare I say it, fun. Tarantino craftily devised a simple way to help the audience get into the 'spirit' of a cold-hearted torturer at work. Never mind that such a brute was obviously raised in an environment devoid of love. He plays a nice sounding, cool song as he gets to work on the cop.

The scene isn't a rant but instead a bright musing on the banality of violence in modern-day America.

What's more it's an enjoyable, even therapeutic scene to watch. Granted, it's not for everyone but it's both dark and happily entertains the casual or serious observer at the same time.

Dali's works portray a tormented mind but would his notions of sexual self rejection (the 'Great Masturbator') and anxious self obsession have any gravity if they were not juxtaposed with an almost joyful, playful sincerity? Dali views life as absurd and painful yet he describes his demons as if they are things to be marvelled at, not hated or deserving of subjugation and denial.

So perhaps the 'confronting' nature of Dali's expression and the lustful excessiveness and control displayed by the young Tarantino point the way towards allowing one's darkness a route into the world through your blog.

It's important to realise you're not one dimensional in your evolutionary make-up and your blog can be used to show your various interesting angles. More depth can always be achieved by showing a subjective counter-point to your current subjectiveness, one made all the more interesting by the presence of contradictions emanating from the same person.

You may come off as a little bit mad when people witness inconsistencies within your moaning, and even - gasp - a little light and/or humour escapes. The best writing is always truthful though, and it's crucial to realise the powerful effect of mixing up your wows with your woes.

Take the annecdote made by a director who met marilyn munroe on the first day of filming. He had heard a lot of varying things sbout Marilyn - some good, some very bad. The best was that she was very alert and personable. The worst was that she lacked intelligence and was a miserable person. He expected to encounter the 'truth' when she arrived. What description was right?

In the end he learned a valuable lesson which he never forgot.

She was both.

Clever and stupid, bright and cloudy - like most people.

So all you need do now is embrace your dark secrets, let them out and, most importantly, don't rant or lecture. Look at yourself as the amazing, pathetic, beautiful, mutant that you are. Let's face it - that's how everyone sees you and how you see everyone. The 'real' you finds you hilariously funny so don't take it too seriously. Remember though, at the same time, your job's an important one. You have to make up for all the one-sided rants all the lesser bloggers produce. Then you'll pull the readers from them to your own gorgeous, conflicted blogosphere filled with endless meaningful drivel.