Who is the Monkey In The Tunnel?

Many addicts have spoken of addiction as ‘A monkey on my back’ which is where my analogy, book title and general way of ‘looking’ at my entire addcition journey was psurned from.

At this point I feel it’s important to say that I am now in recovery.

This is because I feel it may be difficult for anyone seeking to learn anything about abstinence from addiction from an active addict.

I myself would be unlikely to take anything from somebody still living in denial.

Now begins the story of The Monkey In the Tunnel.

Who Is The Monkey In the Tunnel?

Monkey is addiction.

Why is Monkey a monkey and not some other animal or depiction of a particular type of person or anything like that?

Well Monkey is intended to be as useful as possible for the purpose of illustrating what addiction actually is.

It can be fun!

And monkeys are fun. Sure dogs are also fun. Many animals and peopel are a lot of fun. Of course they are.

Still, monkeys can be very mischeovious, enterprising, friendy and dangerous, sometimes all at once.

Basically a monkey works well in the context of the analogy.

Now, when Mio (the character in the novel based on me) first enters ‘The Magic Monkey Tunnel at the foot of Skabba Tor’ he / I is high on some form of generic drug.

In the ‘Smujy Universe’ (my own creation which is essentially the ‘world’ of The Wetlands where the stories I write continually called ‘Tales From the Fabrik Zone’ take place) ‘drugs’ are not necessarily a substance at all.

For a little more context my own personal journey into, through and out of addiction is not linnear or even circuitious at all.

‘Behaviours’ and even ‘thoughts’ compell me to act or, as is often the case, not act at all just as often as substances, coffee (even), sugary snacks (yikes!) or, let’s face it, hard and soft narcotics ever have.

I aim to be ‘relatable’ in my stories which I am aware requires a seering degree of honesty and the real truth is that, as often as a ‘very worrying’ type of, shall we say ‘powder’ or ‘liquid’ has rendered me incapcitated and, likely due to neurodivergent tendencies, unable to stop on the pathway of obsession with it’s ‘grip’ (whatever ‘it’ may be at the time) I have also suffered enormously from simple ‘thoughts’.

Here’s an example - ‘Let’s try to change that person.’

Is thinking ‘I’ll say a lot and seek to overcome my problem with an individual in my close proximity through conversation’ as damaging as say an addiction to cocaine?

My theory is that yes this is certainly the case.

This is not a medical website.

I am not a ‘Psychiatrist’.

I am not even a ‘Yogi’, ‘Guru’, ‘Life Coach’ or ‘Advisor’ at all.

In fact I hate advice.

After all who actualy wnats to receive advice?

All of us know already deep down (at least) what drives us and motivates us and we are often fully aware of our own pain and suffering even whilst caught up in all types of denial.

My aim is rather to be a mirror and a conduit for self-reflection.

For me reflecting intensively and practicing abstinence through confronting triggers and anxious-thinking, really quite ‘directly; is the basis of my own successful attempts at recovery and management of these processes once new, more ‘workable’ livin practices have been manifested into my every day life.

So there is no ‘expert opinion’ going on here.

I can only tell you what I have learned about myself.

In The Magic Monkey Tunnel, Monkey himself (we’ll refer to him as a ‘him’ for now) has gotten in to our car. We’re stuck after all until the emergency services have cleared huge rockfalls at each end of the tunnel.

At the ‘moment’ we’re stuck in a dark place.

The light everywhere is fading as twilight descends upon our Wet City.

The tunnel’s lights flicker and dim.

They sometimes go fully dark.

In the darkness Monkey appears.

Perhaps it’s not all ‘doom and gloom’. 

We could be experiencing Ayahuasca or magic mushrooms and becomming enlightened to a ‘glory’ or a ‘rahpsody’ in teh world we never knew about. It coudl be ecstasy / MDMA.

‘It’ could be almost anything in fact.

But, for the sake of this analogy we’re going to imagine and assume the ‘article’ of our addiction monkey is ‘something harmful’.

Of course we’re always talking about the ‘long-term’ when it comes to harm unless we’re talking about accidents or something messy that happens in the moment.

Still addiction, as we know really is very enjoyable at first. Or at the very least it can be.

This is where Monkey comes in.

Dismissing addiction outright as ‘negative’ isn’t going to get us anyhere really. 

And we are stuck in this long, rather dark tunnel.

Let’s consider the type of tunnel it is though. Like I said I’m no expert. This is just the tale of my own journey. The way I travelled personally.

Maybe your tunnel is longer and twisting with no visible light until the very end or it’s shorter and full of bright light. So much so that the light blinds you completely.

For me I always saw there was a light and it appeared ‘many, many times to me’.

And yes, I’m largely (I don’t mind this label) a ‘Multi-Addict’.

You ight be very caught up in and focussed on ‘one area’ or ‘one substance’. I’m not sure.

We’re all different.

Now this light at the end of the tunnel is a very important concept whether we can see the light or not. After all it’s what we wnat isn’t it? To get into the light.

And it’s there.

It’s just very, very elusive.

This is the anlogy however.

We’re stuck. The jam is here whether we like it or not. We’re in the jam. And it could be a very long time indeed to be able to get out of it. So what are we going to do? Are we going to simply sit there in the dark and the gloom contemplating?

Unfortunately that is what I have found to be the case.

However, the ‘thing is’ no system stays stuck forever. Nothing stays still for a very long in fact. Sure, ‘in our perception’ it can do. It feels  that way. And therefore it is that way. Or is it?

Conclusion 

So, in conclusion (for now, as I am likely to come back to this article to 'add more in' and change it) the concept of The Magic Monkey Tunnel is that the tunnel analogy covers 'all areas' of active addiction and offers us a visualisation for how we can potentially emerge into the light at the end. It's not a new analogy of course but rather one addict's interpretation of this age-old tale.

'Medically-speaking' - although like I said I am no medical expert I have 'heard this from specialists in the field of addiction' - it is true that, once we have the disease then we, quite simply 'have it, this does not mean there is no way out. Sure, in the tunnel when the rockfall has occurred outside and at both ends we are jammed inside and, whether we want out or not (we may still very much want to 'party with Monkey') we can get out in time and with help.

So, no matter where you are in your own personal journey, whether it's 'well on the road' or 'still considering' my story is that we can make it out if we accept that we may be stuck at present and the conditions might well be extremely tough, and yet we can definitely get there in the end.

Best of luck!